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　　FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Longmont, Colorado, United States of America () July 14, 2011 -- Local Longmont, CO resident "Crazy" Wayne Bradford has defied logic by turning himself into a microwave oven. Mr. Bradford has collected parts from dead microwaves for the past 11 months in order to make his dream become reality. "Ever since I began work at Regal Theaters, Texas Instruments, Fuji, Appliance World, and numerous brothels in Amarillo, Texas I have dreamt of one day becoming a microwave oven." Wayne's wife "The Canadian" (her name is withheld to protect her identity) is "confused and horrified, but also turned on" by his new look. "He really gets me hott, with two t's" she said when describing his newfound capabilities. "Crazy" Wayne can now make popcorn and chicken nuggets with the push of a button! "Last week I was able to make a full dinner for one in just 10 minutes. My wife loved it!" Wayne said. He used a "really great and exciting" recipe from the book he was given by his co-workers to acknowledge his achievement, "Microwave Cooking for One". "I love the book - It's really changed our lives for the better" said "Crazy" Wayne, "We feel like a real family when we sit at home and eat microwave dinners for one on our TV trays while watching reruns of Voltron". Waynealso stated "I never have to worry anymore when my wife is home alone, because I know she will gladly enjoy a pre-made microwave meal for one!". He also went on to state that his new goal was to turn his wife into a range and be "mounted" over her for the rest of their happily married lives! Share | Contact Information Name: Appliance-Factory Email: ***@appliancefactory.com